Exactly 3 years ago today, I got on a plane from the United Kingdom to return to the United States for good.
Even after 3 years, my feelings are mixed.
On one hand, I think of the missed opportunities. I likely would’ve obtained dual citizenship – a top goal of mine before moving there – and my United Kingdom driver’s license (I got the provisional, which lasts 10 years). I would’ve had more earnings potential, working wherever I pleased as someone with years of experience. I think of all the countries I didn’t get to visit while there, and how many I could’ve visited if I was still there now. I think of the slowly growing group of acquaintances & friends I was making, which is difficult enough as an introvert, and the other connections I could’ve made.
I think of my disrupted routine. My disrupted plans. My disrupted LIFE. Lost wages. Shady job. Shady authority. Shady bosses. Shady colleagues. No help whatsoever from the local authority for which I worked. Reporting to the Home Office like a f***ing criminal, and the employees there wondering what the hell I was doing there, feeling bad for me, because it was obvious that this wasn’t something purposely done. The absolute hell I had to navigate, both over there and over here (but especially over there). Shady relatives. Shady friends. And I become enraged all over again.
Then on the other hand, I look at life for the past 3 years, and I’m glad that I’m home. (Look at “Brexit”, as an example.)
I’ve not been back yet, but I’ll be back soon enough. I have a wedding to attend there. I also still have unfinished business to handle, and some involved will NOT be happy when I’m done. But at least the unfinished business will finally be finished for good.
Will I ever live abroad again? I don’t know. My inclination is “HELL no.” But who knows. I can say 1 thing though – I’ll never stop exploring the world.
Submitted with mixed feelings,